The Airing of Grievances: LOST

What I know about LOST:

• While hunting, Locke finds a hatch.
• Some crazy bitch tries to kill Locke because her brother died.
• Locke is pretty shady, but cool with me.
• There is time travel.
• The island disappears and seems to be controlled by The Wizard.
• Desmond almost goes crazy via time travel, but figures shit out.
• Someone got raped.
• Batmanuel.

What I don’t know about LOST:

• How everyone got on the island.
• How some people got off.
• Why those people want to go back.
• What the government has to do with it.
• TIME TRAVEL?
• How a wheel moved AN ENTIRE ISLAND.

What I know about real life:

• Islands don’t move.
• People don’t travel through time.
• No bitch is that loyal.
• Body hair does not suspend itself in time.
• Batmanuel.
• I haven’t had a TV in two years.